


Mama Bear and the Three Immortals

by firecat



Series: Maze's Mischief, Lucifer's Crucible [1]
Category: Lucifer (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:15:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24066442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firecat/pseuds/firecat
Summary: Chloe Decker checks in on Nick Fury's new team prior to their mission. She finds Loki, Lucifer, & Mazikeen in full agreement—that they hate each other.Lead-in to a series, but can stand alone.
Series: Maze's Mischief, Lucifer's Crucible [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1736533
Comments: 8
Kudos: 62





	Mama Bear and the Three Immortals

“Lucifer, get down here now!” Chloe hisses into the phone. “Before they kill each other!”

“Just _let_ them, Detective," is Lucifer's bored reply. "It will be easier. I’m so tired of this!”

“We need them both! Did you forget the stakes?” 

“Bloody hell. I’ll be there in a minute.” 

Chloe puts away her phone and creeps toward the door to Maze’s training room–dungeon, clutching her pistol in both hands. Inside the room it sounds like a cat fight is ramping up. Low growls and hisses. Angry words in a language Chloe doesn’t recognize. 

Lucifer strides up and wrenches open the door. Immediately he throws up his hands and catches two daggers that have just been hurled at his face. One is a claw-shaped _karambit,_ rune-carved, with a finger hold at the end of the handle. The other has a wicked two-pronged blade; the grip is a translucent blue material. 

“Are you _quite_ finished with the toys now?” Lucifer snaps. He throws the knives to the floor. “Yes we are going to interrupt your mutual murder pact. You can destroy each other to your hearts’ content when we’ve finished the work we’re all here to do.” To Chloe, it seems as if his eyes flash red. He steps through the door and shouts a command in a strange language. The floor shudders.

“You can come in now, Detective," he calls to Chloe. "They’re disarmed. As much as they can be without literally removing their arms, but I don’t think they’ll hurt you. Unless you get between them.”

Chloe, without putting away her pistol, tentatively enters the room, scanning for danger.

It’s the size of a basketball court. Along the walls, Chloe sees exercise equipment and...other contraptions. She doesn’t want to speculate on their uses.

And there’s the danger. And the other danger. Circling each other. 

Maze is dusky, with luxuriant dark hair and black eyes. A scar runs through her left eyebrow. She’s petite and almost fragile looking, but Chloe knows better. She doesn’t know what to think about the whole “she’s a centuries-old demon who followed me from Hell to Earth” thing, but if such a thing were possible, Maze would be someone you’d believe it of, at least after watching her fight. Chloe had seen her take down a roomful of brawny thugs without even breaking a sweat. And the way she’d laughed afterward! Like a child riding a roller coaster.

The other danger cuts a very different figure. He’s tall and pale, with shoulder-length black hair. A smirk and slightly quirked eyebrow give his face a wry, playful appearance...if “playful” is what a wolf looks like right before he eats your grandmother. Where Maze is visibly focused, facing toward him, the man wearing green-and-gold leather armor is turned sideways to her. He’s pacing with sinuous grace, and his body language appears at first glance off-hand and casual. 

At first glance. Chloe’s been a cop long enough to see the calculation in the mesmerizing emerald eyes. The controlled precision in the way he moves.

His name is Loki. 

Chloe wonders for the umpteenth time why she was chosen to be on this team. She feels so damned out of her depth. She’s a cop for crying out loud, not a superhero or a “god” — a frigging god now? Isn't it complicated enough having to deal with a guy who claims to be the Devil? (For all that he is sometimes helpful in crime-solving.) 

And for the umpteenth time she remembers the man in charge of the mission...Director Fury his name was?...fixing her with his one good eye and saying “We’re asking you to join because I hear you’re the person best suited to, ah, manage Lucifer. We need his skills in order to pull this off, and we also hear he’s a bit of a loose cannon.” 

“If you mean a leaking drum of gasoline in a match factory, yes sir,” she affirms. 

“Will you help us, Detective Decker?" Fury's right eye bores into hers. She shudders to imagine what caused the scars radiating out from the patch over his left, dark slashes on his brown skin. "The fate of the world may depend on it.” 

Chloe is a simple woman. She just wants to bring down criminals and raise her daughter. Why does she always find herself surrounded by over-the-top drama queens? 

She pulls her mind back to the matter at hand. “Stand down, you two,” she orders, putting up her pistol. 

Maze and Loki exchange a glance — “Just you wait.” They relax...slightly. 

“What is going on?” Chloe demands. 

They both open their mouths to speak...and both shut them again, as stubbornness settles on their faces.

Chloe rolls her eyes and turns to Lucifer.

“It’s my fault, Detective,” he grumbles. “Mr Loki and I...are having a hard time seeing eye-to-eye on several points. I thought he and Maze might get along better. So I, uh, locked them both in here. Apparently I was wrong. Perhaps Mr Loki doesn’t get along with _anyone.”_

Loki rises to this bait. “I get along just fine with people who aren’t pretentious sluts. Who don’t try to lock me up with their pet succubi.”

It's Maze's turn to snap at the dangling worm. “I’m a demon, not a succubus. I’m a firm believer in sexual consent. I just don’t bother getting consent from people I intend to _punish.”_ She smacks her fist into her hand. 

Lucifer turns to Chloe with his hands raised. She’s seen the gesture before — You _see_ what troubles I have? 

“‘Slut’ I will grant you, but ‘pretentious’?” Lucifer objects. “This is L.A. I don’t even rank in the top three million!”

Chloe hates to admit it, but he’s right. Where so many Los Angeleans are quick to trot out false identities, fake compliments, and promises they never intend to keep, Lucifer is honest, sometimes painfully so. Never ask Lucifer what he thinks of your outfit or hairstyle. Everyone down at the station has been stung by that one. 

And then it dawns on her that Loki's reputation, as far as deception is concerned, is quite different. Perhaps she shouldn't have suggested to Fury that Loki stay at Lux prior to the mission. Ordinarily, teams bond best if they spend some time together before the outset. But nothing is ever ordinary where Lucifer is concerned. And it just figures the same would be true of a trickster god.

“And if it’s ‘share our grievances’ hour,” Lucifer goes on, “I have a few to level on my guest. I told him to stay out of the wine cellars, and an hour later, my Chateau Lafite 1787 was missing.” 

“As if I’d bother stealing your putrid swill of fermented grapes,” sneers Loki. 

“Then why did I find your glove down there?”

“I don’t even wear gloves.”

Lucifer throws something that Loki reflexively catches. It’s a glove that perfectly matches his green-and-gold leathers. 

Loki doesn’t look the slightest bit chagrined. “Fine, I did bring gloves. I still—“

Lucifer turns back to Chloe, and there's that gesture of victimhood again. 

“ENOUGH!” shouts Chloe. 

Three supposedly supernatural beings startle and pivot to face her. She’s always surprised when it works, and it secretly gives her a little thrill. 

“What do I have to do, spank you all and send you to bed without your suppers?” she snaps. “ _Not a peep of an innuendo out of you, Lucifer.”_

Lucifer pouts.

Chloe finds herself ranting. “Each one of you claims to be hundreds of years older me, not to mention many times more powerful. How often have I heard you refer to me and other people with pity as ‘you humans’ and ‘you mortals,’ as if we were so many doddering pet mice?" 

Three pairs of eyes—brown, black, and green—blink in surprise. 

“And yet, _somehow,_ I always end up having to be the mom! Fine. _I don’t care who did what to whom._ Maze stays in her training room. Lucifer goes to his penthouse. Loki goes to the spa room. Do something, anything, _whatever_ you need to do to distract yourselves, as long as all three of you _stay_ in your rooms until we pick you up for the operation tomorrow. All right?”

Three disgruntled nods. 

“Now march!” Chloe concludes. She spins on her heel and exits the room.


End file.
